Jumpy Frog
Why was the frog nervous?
He had butterflies in his stomach.
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12 minutes ago
Jest Me
Deal With It.
Victims
My Stalkees
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Stale Jokes
12 groaned...:
Well, maybe in a few days I'll figure it out. For now, about the frog....
One day a beautiful Princess was walking through the swamp (I dunno...just a wanderlust, I guess) and she came upon a frog who was quite nervous and fidgety in a pond....
"What's the matter with you, lil frog,"she said out loud..not expecting an answer. She was just one of those people who talked to themselves a lot.
But, to her surprise the frog answered!
"Ah! Sweet Lady! If I could perhaps borrow a moment of time from you?"
She looked down in amazement at the small talking creature..."What may I do, sir frog?"
"A terrible witch declared a curse on me to render me as you see here. I am very handsome, normally, and very RICH, too" he sucked in a great belly of air and called out a wonderfully deep 'RIBBET' to the forest in general.
She noticed that her first impression was a bit skewed....This frog was quite large. It was an example of the iceberg effect, to be sure....
"...and i can help you how?" she asked again.
"Well, if you would but kiss me, I will take you to my great castle where you will live happily ever after!" he replied...
"Oh! That sounds marvelous! Will I be a Queen?"
"No no no....You;ll do the laundry and the cooking and the cleaning and the work around the castle for me..." and he threw a big smile at her...
And that very night she remembered that smile as she finished off the second, butter covered frog leg.
And she giggled a bit, too.
And that's why the frog was nervous....
Cute
I was reminded of the fellow who went into the bar and asked the bartender if he could get a free drink if he had an act the bartender had never seen before.
"Sure, fella," said the bartender...
The fellow reached down into his pocket and carefully brought out a miniture PIANO and set it on the bar. Then he reached into his other pocket and carefully pulled out a FROG and sat him at the piano.
The frog began playing beautiful music. Wonderful stuff! Classical, jazz, pop, even a little country and western music.
The bartender gave him a few drinks for free, because the bar started filling up, watching the frog play the piano.
Then the guy said, "....if I show you another great trick, will you give me twenty dollars?"
"Ha! It'll have to be a danged good trick!" said the bartender.
So the fellow reached into his inside jacket pocket and carefully pulled out a cage with a mouse in it, and pulled the mouse out and stood him up next to the piano playing frog..
And suddenly the room filled with beautiful singing. Opera that made folks cry, rock music that made everyone want to dance....just amazing!
A guy stepped out of the crowd and said to the fellow, "Sell me your piano playing frog and your fantastic mouse singer!"
"Well, I couldn't sell both, but tell you what, I'll sell you the mouse for $50000,"
Well, the guy pulled out $50000 cash and handed it to the guy, and he left.
The bartender yelled at him..."Why did you do THAT?!" he hollered...."Those critters of yours are worth a million dollars!"
"Relax," the fellow said with a grin...."The frog is a ventriloquist."
i don't know whether to groan or to grimace ..
at all of it here ..
well, except butterflygirl's comment
but at least his ass is water tight.
OK very cute!!!!!
Frogs, by nature aren't ventriloquists. Nor do they suffer from anxiety. They are at risk, however, of cornbread batter and hot fat.
Boneman is cute with the cutest stories and the cutest ...... well the cutest everything
Sorry sj, boneman has totally upstaged you (wink).
Do you come up with these by yourself?
People seem to like boneman... SJ you might have competition on your own blog!
funny one man
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